Pleasure's Long Shadow
This week, I’d like to explore the intersection of pleasure and social and environmental justice. Since the verdict on Tuesday, I’ve been thinking about the ways in which the pleasure we experience is tempered by the suffering of others. What does it mean to be a white, upper-middle-class pleasure researcher and advocate in a world with so much systemic injustice? What does it mean to advocate for your own pleasure and others’ when you occupy a place of immense privilege?
It’s an uncomfortable question. In fact, sitting with these paradoxes can be downright unpleasant. And yet, allowing for these painful, confusing emotions can lead to a place that is deeper, truer, more authentic, and, yes, more pleasurable.
I find it hard to get excited about getting vaccinated knowing that my friends in South Africa and other parts of the world won’t have the same privilege for a long time. The pleasure of seeing loved ones after a year apart is tempered by knowing how many of us have lost someone we love in this time. I try on a beautiful dress in a store but then wonder who made it and whether they took any pleasure in their work. Were they paid well? Were they appreciated for their time and care? Might there be some energetic trace of them in the fabric and stitches that would curtail the pleasure I might get from wearing it home? What of a lovely meal? If I enjoy an evening of food made with love with my friends and then walk into the street to see my neighbors hungry, doesn’t that diminish the pleasure of the experience?
There is a strain of thought, best articulated by the writer adrienne marie brown, which states that the social and reciprocal nature of social justice can be inherently pleasurable. Rather than looking at the suffering of others as a limit on one’s ability to experience pleasure, brown calls us to find our pleasure in making the world a better place: ensuring that neighbors are well fed, that friends around the world have access to medical care, that the planet is respected and its inhabitants are nourished.
So if it can be pleasurable, why aren’t we doing it more? Like--what’s in our way?
To be continued.
From the Institute of Pleasure Studies
Read: Pleasure Activism by adrienne marie brown. Required reading for any card-carrying pleasure researcher. Let’s read it together. Again and again. Check out this podcast conversation.
Learn:The People’s Vaccine: Meet the Texas Doctor who is working on a low-cost, scalable, open-source vaccine for the world.
Study: You can find more about Zahava Griss and her work here. She teaches tools that build the vagus nerve, create a sense of shared humanity, and inspire collaboration.
Play: Joe and I are beginning our Relationship Workshop. Relationship Tripping begins May 6th. If you are in a committed relationship with a partner and looking to go deeper, practice tools in a community, and play, get in touch. jaye@suejaye.com